Hectic Life...As Usual.

A very quick update on my life the past week or so... (I only have 20 minutes before I need to leave for work for a double shift)

- I am again single. Boo :( I am going with I'm so awesome guys don't know how to handle it and feel inadequate. So if you know any extremely awesome guys, or are one yourself, let me know!

- My family came into town last weekend for a 60th birthday party. I didn't watch what I ate at all but had a wonderful time with family!

- On my way to work last Sunday my car started to over heat adding more unneeded stress and monetary strain to my life.

- I finally feel like I have my footing in my long term sub position, but am still running around in the morning getting things together for that day's class since a lot of times I have to drive straight from school ending at 3:12 to a 4:00 shift at the brewhouse. I feel like I need to stay one day after school when I don't work a second job and just copy all the shit I need for a month!

-Last week I ate fast food again. It is an excuse, but I feel like I can't get to the grocery store to buy food. The weekends are filled with shifts from 12-8 (or something like that) and the last thing I want to do after standing and running around a restaurant is to go grocery shopping. I usually come home, and go straight to bed. Last night I worked until 11:20, came home and slept in until 9:30 then had to get up and get ready for my shift at 12, not enough time to shower, get ready, and go grocery shopping. I'd love to take a week off from the brewhouse, but really need all the shifts I can get until march 10th when I get my first full month substituting check. I'm hoping then I can breathe a little easier, but until then, it is non stop working.

- I got on the scale this morning and am up 2 pounds. I am feeling indifferent about the gain. I know I have been making good choices with the food I bring home from work. But I need to make good decisions during the week, when I am so tired and fast food, or just not healthy food is so easy (aka a frozen pizza). It is all about planning and making time for my health, which I have not been doing.

And that is all for now, off to work.

Redemption Day

Although today I didn't go to the gym, I did stay under my calorie goal (by nine calories). Even though I didn't get the gym in (I'm beyond tired, but need to not make that an excuse anymore, because I'm ALWAYS tired) I am still very happy with my eating choices today since the past two days have been train wrecks.

My Pesto Pasta and Shrimp for Dinner (About 400 calories)

Epic Fail...

Ug...

Yesterday I had fast food, and soda, breaking my new years resolution :( And today at Trader Joe's I didn't use reusable bags. I just started watching the Biggest Loser and am feeling unhappy about my choices today and yesterday. I need to take this opportunity to change my actions and get inspired from the Biggest Loser and get back on track T-O-M-O-R-R-O-W.

That is all...

Week Two

Weighed in this morning and wasn't surprised that the 1.5 pounds I lost last week had found their way back. I really made poor eating decisions this week and didn't make it to the gym as much as I had hoped. The poor eating decisions were kind of unavoidable, but I could have worked harder. It was a wonderfully horrible week. I was completely spent from Wednesday until this morning (I'm not subbing or working at the brewhouse), but I am excited to be in a long term sub position while my friend is on maternity leave.


This week in a nutshell:

Monday- Had a really nice lunch date, and we both ordered salads at the restaurant.

Tuesday- Went to Body Pump and Turbo Kickboxing and enjoyed watching the biggest loser.

Wednesday- Went to observe my friend Dominique's class because I was going to take over when she went on maternity leave in the next few weeks. She ended up getting a call from her doctor during 2nd period saying she needed to go to the hospital right away. I ended up teaching the rest of her class. And then I worked a shift at the brewhouse. Needless to say I was exhausted and didn't make a good choice for my dinner at work.

Thursday- I subbed in Dominique's class again. I tried my best to bring a healthy lunch, but I didn't have any lunch food ready to go or planned for the week because I wasn't expecting on working. The new guy did make me a super nice dinner of steamed veggies, pork tenderloin, and salad. But I did have two beers that evening. But we had a wonderful evening.

Friday-  I subbed again and worked a closing shift at the brewhouse. I picked a calzone to have for dinner. Not the best choice, but I did pack it full of veggies. 

Saturday- I worked at the brewhouse and was exhausted and made a really bad choice for dinner. I basically ate a whole days worth of calories for dinner alone.

Sunday- Another shift at the brewhouse. But I did find a new dinner that I think I'll be getting. It's a balsamic glazed chicken with a salad and mashed potatoes and is about 600 calories. Not too bad.

This week's goals are to pack better lunches, and make it to the gym as many times as possible this week. I don't work at the brewhouse again until Saturday so I am hoping that I can go to the gym most weeknights. It will be sooo much easier to get to the gym when I don't have to go from school ending at 3:15 to a 4:00 shift at the brewhouse.  I also need to make better dinner choices this week to see if I can get that 1.5 pounds to leave again!

Workout High

Right now I am on a total workout high! I did Turbo Kickboxing and then a Body Pump class. I am feeling really full of energy and am in a really good mental place too.

I came home from the gym and ate what seemed like 5 cups of broccoli (but was really about 2) because it was gonna go bad in a bit.

I really love working out hard on Tuesday so then I can feel good about watching the Biggest Loser without feeling guilty that I didn't workout today.

I'm settling in for the night with the Biggest Loser and some herbal tea!

Week One

So I am counting this Monday as the end of week one of the new year. I'm weighing in Mondays again and did so this morning. I am down 1.5 pounds! Yes! First week, first success! I am excited to start the new year with a loss, and can't wait to keep it going.

This week in a nutshell:

Monday- Bad date night, but ate really well.

Tuesday- Went to Body Pump at 24 and loved lifting again. But at the end I was SO sore.

Wednesday- A family member got the stomach flu and needed me to stay the night and watch her kids. A friend had brought her Spaghetti Factory for dinner, so I had the Mazithra Cheese and Brown Butter pasta that was there. Not complaining, it was yummy, but not super healthy.

Thursday- Helped with my cousin in the morning, and was wiped out by playing with them the night before and in the morning, and not having slept in my own bed. I came home and slept the rest of the day.

Friday-  I went to a new class called PiYo Strength. It was was really interesting. It's a mix between Pilates and Yoga. I really enjoyed that it was a little faster paced than yoga, but worked on holding poses and strength moves to build muscle. It was a great way to work my muscles out after Body Pump earlier in the week even though I was still sore! :)

Saturday- I worked an 8 hour shift at the brewhouse and was awarded for my effort and teamwork with the manager buying me an appetizer. I picked something "bad", but it was a super long day, and I skipped lunch and couldn't resist. Willpower was at a low at 8:30pm after only having a bowl of cheerios and a a banana all day.

Sunday- Had another first date with a new guy. He was history major like I was and we both enjoy reading mystery books, so we decided to meet in the Barns and Noble bookstore in the mystery section (how cute, right?!). We ended up sitting in the coffee cafe area, but didn't get anything to drink. We talked about how we are both trying to eat healthier and exercise, so I feel a lot better that this guy could fit into my life better than last Monday's date. We spent the rest of the date looking at books. In hopes that our date went well, he even brought a book from his place that he thought I would like. The date did go well, so I took the book and now have some new reading material! And then headed off to work for a dinner shift.

I have spent the morning cleaning the house and doing catch up on laundry. And have a lunch date with the "mystery book guy". :)

Things I did well last week: I made it to the gym, although only twice. I also have been eating a healthy breakfast every morning. I also have used reusable bags all this week while shopping.

Things to work on for this week: I want to try to drink more water. I had a couple of good days, but slacked on water drinking other days. I would also like to work on making sure I am eating a good lunch and dinner and not skipping meals like I did a few times last week.

Relationship Realization

First of all, I am soooo excited that a new season of The Biggest Loser is starting tonight!!! And I feel worthy to watch because I spent 90 minutes at the gym this morning! I'm also going to try to do some sit-ups and stretches during the commercials to get in a little extra!

On the 30th and 31st I rearranged my room to make room for some new furniture. On the first I felt fine and ate well. I didn't hit the gym, but did some Just Dance 3 to sweat a bit. But on the second my back was tweaked. I couldn't move without feeling a little pinch, so I decided I didn't want to make things worse, so I didn't do any exercise and sat with a heating pad on my back most of the day.

Last night I had a first date. It was someone I met on an online dating site. We had been texting for a week before hand, and he seemed like a normal guy. The pictures from the site showed him as a 6'4" guy with a little extra weight on, which is fine because as we all know, I have a little extra weight on too. I had mentioned to him that I was trying to get back into running, and not drinking. I shared with him my new years resolutions about health and fitness and felt that I had held nothing back to who I am and what my life focus is now. I let him pick the restaurant for dinner. He picked California Pizza Kitchen. I was ok with that because I know they have some healthful options and small plates. I picked out that I was going to have an arugula and asparagus salad with a side of foccacia bread. It did put me over my calorie count by about 300, but I was ok with that.

We meet each other at the restaurant and my first impression is that his photos were about a year and +100 pounds out of date. We introduce ourselves and head to our table. The first thing he does is offer me the cocktail menu, when he knew I was trying not to drink. Strike One. I told him to feel free to have one, but I wouldn't be joining. We order, I stuck with my salad and bread, he ordered four cheese ravioli and a taco appetizer. The conversation was alright, not sparkling witty sweep me off my feet conversation though. The dessert menu arrives, and he tries to tempt me to get something. Why are you trying to sabotage me when we just met!? Strike Two. It didn't seem as though he wanted the date to end after dinner, so I suggested we walk to the BJs at the other end of the mall.

Not even a fourth of the way to the restaurant his breathing gets heavier. I was thinking, "well, ok, this is definitely not a person that would want to run a 5k with me, or it would be difficult to go to Disneyland with". I had decided that I was just going to get water and if he wanted something, like a cocktail, that would be fine. I just knew they were open later and it was a casual place to talk. When we went to sit down I saw my worst nightmare happening, but not to me. He didn't fit in the booth with a non-movable table. I didn't even think that we should grab a high top table, I was thinking comfort, and booths are comfortable. He kinda squeezes in, and immediately I suggest we get a tall table. At work I see people walk in who clearly will not fit in a booth, so I seat them at a table so they don't have to ask or be embarrassed having to squeeze in. Then he orders a Pazooki (a cookie with ice cream). Strike Three. On a first date I feel that you are to be on your best behavior and not make waves. If someone told me they were a recovering alcoholic, I would never order a cocktail in front of them. At that point I really tried to drive home my dedication to being healthy, hoping that he might respond positively and say that he is looking to do the same, but he just kept eating his cookie. And that was kind of the deal breaker for me.

We left the date open ended and didn't plan another one. I drove home feeling like a horrible person that I didn't want to date this guy because of his eating habits and weight. I was wondering how to tell him that I didn't want to see him again, should I just go with the standard "There just wasn't any sparks" (which there wasn't). I got up this morning even more dedicated to my health because I never want to not be able to sit in a booth! (Among other things). I went to a Body Pump class and felt SO good after. Even though at one point my legs and arms were shaking while squatting or doing tricep dips. I also went for a mile on the elliptical when I was done and came home and made a healthy egg scramble.

I was still feeling guilty about why I didn't want to see this guy again. I had to call my mom and dad (separate calls, haha). I explained to my dad my feelings and the situation and he made the point that is wasn't my date's weight that was the deal breaker, it was the fact that his lifestyle doesn't mesh with mine at this point in time. That I need someone that will be taking the same journey or is supportive of mine and won't sabotage it. My mom told me exactly the same thing. It made me feel better that they could help me sort down to the root of why I didn't want to see this person again. I have no problem with extra weight on my significant other, it is more the support I need and deserve from a partner.

I still haven't found a way to let him down gently that I don't want to see him again. I'm hoping that a lack of me texting him back will give him a hint... But at least I learned something about myself and what I'm looking for in a partner. That is my relationship realization.

Starting 2012 Off Right

First of all, Happy New Year to all. I spent last night working at the Brewhouse until 7:30pm. I got my last "bad" meal from work, my favorite Santa Fe Spring Rolls, deep fried with a yummy (and I'm sure fattening) dipping sauce. I came home, didn't drink, and just relaxed at home. I set my alarm for 11:55, in case I fell asleep (which I did), so I could take this picture to remind me that now is a new year.

For the past two weeks I have being trying to think about my new year resolutions and how I want to achieve them. My friend Dianna posted this link to a women's fitness group I started on facebook, and it really got me thinking.
http://www.11points.com/Personal/11_Findings_From_My_Resolution_To_Work_Out_Every_Single_Day_In_2011?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Feed%3A+11points+%2811Points.com+RSS+Feed%29
The point of the link is that this person made a resolution last year to work out at least 20 minutes a day EVERYDAY of the year. They thought about what working out meant to them, was it running for 20 min a day, going to the gym, etc. I have decided to do something like that myself. Also, while at home a family friend Julia read a status from one of her facebook friends "Somewhere, someone busier than you is out running". And it got me thinking, my life is really not busy at all, and even if it was, can I not manage 20 minutes of exercise a day? Yes, I can. Even if it is just running down my street in one direction for 10 minutes, and then turn around and run back. Not hard.

After much thought, my new year resolutions are as follows:
- Drink (at least) 64 oz of water a day
- Use reusable grocery bags at all costs
- Do at least 20 minutes of intense exercise a day, every day ("intense exercise" is a fluid concept, but does not count walking around the mall, walking the block, etc. It needs to make me sweat and breath hard)
- No soda (I don't drink that much anyways, so it shouldn't be hard to cut out)
- No fast food (I did way better with this in 2011 than any other year, but I really want to make an effort to just say no to fast food)
- Blog regularly, it really does help me stay on track 
- Get back to running some 5Ks to work up to a 10K or half marathon

I woke up this morning and hopped right on the scale to see what damage I had done over the holidays. To my surprise I had only gained 2 lbs. I put on my Brewhouse slacks last night and they felt tighter than usual, so I was afraid it would be more like +5 or 7 pounds. I got dressed had a bowl of weight control oatmeal. And then headed to Safeway to buy some groceries to restock my fridge and pantry. I was very careful to think out meals and think about what I really needed to eat to get back on track. I also found a magazine to help inspire me to get back on track, the People "Half their Size" issue. I also got home to find a Fitness Magazine that got delivered when I was at home. I made a few open faced turkey, laughing cow cheese, and lettuce sandwiches with a fruit leather and BBQ flavored wheat thins.

I am going to make a gym schedule (or at least write down class times so I know when some of my favorites will be offered) and take a look at my magazines. I also have a yummy fish dinner planned for tonight to keep the good eating going. I am looking forward to what 2012 has in store for me. 2011 beat me up a bit, but losing 40 pounds last year made me feel great and proved to myself that I can make it work, I just need to put in the work! :) So far 2012 is looking better, I am back on a healthy eating track, have my job at the Brewhouse and a long term subbing position on the horizon, and a promising first date scheduled for tomorrow night. I need to keep organized and focused on me and my goals and I'm looking forward to kicking healthy habits into high gear in January to keep them going strong all through 2012!