Moving

I've decided to move my weightloss journey blog to www.workingoutandworkingit.tumblr.com It is an easier format to use and update quickly. Feel free to follow me there!

Four Weeks

 When thinking about losing weight and getting healthy its hard to take things in stride.

How I feel

I need to stop thinking like the above, and start being more realistic like the below.

How I need to think

I just placed 4 weeks, 8 weeks, and 12 weeks into my iPhone calendar to see if things fall along these lines.

Next week I am to attend a family reunion at Lake Almanor and last summer had vowed to feel comfortable with my progress to wear a bikini at the lake. Life happened, and I am not going to make that goal. We have reunions every two-three years and I hope that I can can keep my promise to be able to wear a bikini next reunion!

Cleaning House

For those of you who read my blog and am in the same position as I am needing/wanting to lose 50-100 pounds you can relate to the following. Someone looking to lose 10 pounds might not grasp the daunting, immense, and long haul that we are in for. Sometimes I think that it's comparable to walking into a house in which someone has been hording their entire life. For people looking to lose 10 pounds, it's like asking them to straighten up and clean a desk in the house. It looks a little hard, but it's just one small place and won't take too long. Looking to lose 50-100 pounds is like looking at the house filled with junk and unwanted things and knowing that you have to clean it all. You look at the house knowing that you have to clean it all and you want it done now because you don't like the way it looks or the way it makes you feel. But like most big tasks sometimes you don't know where to start and feel very overwhelmed. So what do you do when faced with a huge task? Sometimes you put it off, sometimes you do clean the metaphorical desk and feel good about that but then look at the rest of the house (your body) and think that it's just too much.

When I first started my blog I was in a very good place to start cleaning up that house. I was unemployed and receiving unemployment benefits. I had nothing else to do so why not tackle the house and get it clean! I did a very good job cleaning house and was very happy with the results. As time went on I used all the unemployment money and had to get a job, which then turned into two jobs. I started to let things pile up in my house. Leaving things here and there. Things would come up and people would come to Sacramento to visit, and the balloons and streamers (food and beer) were allowed to pile up in my house (my hips, thighs, and ass) without feeling the need to clean up. And you don't notice that things are sliding back to where you once were because you leave stuff around little by little. Sometimes you feel the need to clean and go to the gym or eat healthy for awhile but then you look at the house and think that you have so much cleaning to do. As much as people tell you that you should clean or that they will help you. It is something that you need to be motivated to clean on your own.

After letting my house get almost as cluttered and dirty as I had when I started this journey I have new resolve to get back to cleaning and stay committed to it. I feel like I have a two story house to clean, but am looking just to clean off that desk to begin with, then move to the dining room table, and so on tackling portions at a time to not get overwhelmed but keep my eye on the whole house and make sure to follow through with cleaning it all. Although I can have my little group of maid cheerleaders helping me to stay motivated to clean, I need to be the one to make the hard choices, make it to the gym, and keep myself motivated. I have rolled up my sleeves and pulled all my cleaning tricks out of my bag and am ready to do work!

(And that is your metaphor for the day, haha)

Slow Going

Since my last post its been slow going. I'm not sure if I am still not mentally in the health game because of my family member's passing or just in a funky foggy place, but it's been hard to get on track. I spent about four days at home in Humboldt and didn't really watch what I ate/drank, but didn't do that much damage weight wise, but didn't do anything that really made me feel good about myself. On top of that my car had a bad head gasket or something that is costing way more than I can afford and has gotten me stressed. My car is actually still in Humboldt getting fixed and I need to go get it this coming weekend. I've decided to stay away from all the restaurants that I went to last week back home, and to stay on track with my calories.

Mexican Omelet

Today I woke with a new resolve though. It might be the realization that I have a 5k to run on the 6th of June, or the up coming reunions, or the fact that I'm not liking what I'm seeing in the mirror. I made a super protein omelet for breakfast today, have a plan that I intend to stick to for lunch and dinner, and have good food in the fridge to make this week great.

Realization that once you fall off the wagon and the longer you are off the harder it is to get back on. I'm over it. I'm running my booty to that damn wagon and jumping on!

Up Hill Battle

Photo from top of parking structure

Yesterday I went to my bodypump class in the AM with my favorite instructor ever Cathie. I hadn't been able to go to get class because of teaching, and was so excited to get back to her classes. I also ran into my friend Sirena who is getting back to the gym too. It felt really great to lift.

Then I went to work at the Brewhouse and had fully intended to get the Thai Mango Chicken Salad for 550 calories, but ended up having  a horrible shift and ended up getting a roast beef sandwich instead. Stress eating for sure! I had a good talk with my roommate after dinner and felt better.

I woke up disappointed in myself for not sticking to my dinner plan, so I decided to get up and kick my butt by running up 24 flights of stairs at a parking structure down the block. It felt great to be out in the morning in the fresh air going up and down the stairs.

Italian and Mexican Zucchini Boats

I went to Trader Joe's after and got some healthy food to help me keep on track! I ended up making some really good lunches with zucchinis (modified from this recipe http://www.adashofsass.com/2010/06/22/italian-and-southwestern-zucchini-boats/). I had the Italian flavored one for lunch at only 290 calories. I can't wait to have the Mexican flavored one tomorrow night!

I work at 4:25 tonight and AM getting the salad I should have had last night for dinner tonight! I also fully intend to go to Cathie's bodypump class tomorrow morning and go on the treadmill or elliptical after!

A lot can happen in three weeks

Parents

A lot has happened in the three weeks since I last posted.

My parents came to Sacramento mid April. It was great to see them, although I definitely didn't stay on track with eating while they were here. The next week things ended with the guy I was seeing. I'm back on the market and all the more reason to focus on myself and what I need to do. I have two things to work towards this summer, my ten year high school reunion and a family reunion both in July. I need to kick things into high gear ASAP.

Brewhouse Crew March of Dimes Walk

On April 28th I did a 3.5 mile walk with coworkers from the brewhouse for the March of Dimes. It was a beautiful day in Sacramento, and I decided to walk the one mile to the Capital where the race started and then back home after the walk was over. I was very excited that I got 20,000 steps in that day (a record for me with my FitBit). Unfortunately soon after I was finished with the walk my family received horrible news that one of my dad's brothers had died in a motorcycle accident while on the way to visit his daughter in Santa Rosa. It was a complete shock and tragedy for our family. It was very hard to deal with, especially alone in Sacramento without my immediate family. I totally shut down and did absolutely no exercise and took solace in food and alcohol.

Top- Pat, his son Jesse, my dad, and I
Left- Pat, Uncle Ed, and my Dad
Right- Pat

The service was this weekend and 45 out of the 46 members of the King family met in Sacramento to honor and remember the life of my Uncle Pat. It was so nice seeing everyone and having the amazing support that our family brings to each other. We also had two family member birthday celebrations this weekend. While family was here we ate out a lot and drank even more. I am feeling physically gross by the amount that I ate/drank. Today at brunch with the family many family members were resolving to eat better and live more healthy. I am TOTALLY on board with that. I've had enough of using food/drink to mourn, and am ready to live life to the fullest the way that Pat did. We are all meeting for our family reunion in about 70 days at a lake and want to be able to jog on the trails, swim in the lake and look good laying on the beach. I made a pack with my aunt that I would email her to check in on our healthy living every Wednesday. I am going to do my best to keep up with that pack and stay on track. I am going to be back to bloggin' and joggin' starting NOW!

Modifications

Lately I've been thinking a lot about modification. Modifying the way I think, act, eat, etc. This week has been full of modifications, mostly in the way that I think.

New workout clothes

On Tuesday I had a coupon for 50% off of $140 at Old Navy, and decided to go buy some new clothes. When I got there I started looking at summer clothes, thinking that I might buy a size smaller in hopes that I would get there by summer time. But instead I picked out some new workout clothes to help me get to where I want to be and make me feel and look good while working out. I did find a cute pair of jeans one size down that were on sale that I bought as a pair of goal jeans. I very happy with my new gym clothes and am looking forward to using them often.


I also modified my sleeping schedule and got up at 5:15am on Wednesday to go to a 6am Zumba class before work. I laid in bed thinking to myself how much I wanted to stay in bed, but I knew that if I didn't get up and go to the gym that I wouldn't go at all. When I got there still groggy, I was thinking to myself that the 14 people and myself must be crazy to come to the gym this early to shake it. But once we got going I really enjoyed myself and burned some good calories before work. After work I even made time to go to the gym again for a 10 min jog and a 30 min ab class.

Today was a rough day at school. The kids were wilder than I wanted, and I was feeling very fed up by 3:15. I got in my car, and my check engine light went on. My stress level shot through the roof. I thought to myself, ok, that's it... I'm driving through Chick-fil-a! As I got closer to the exit for fried fat food I thought of all the calories that I would be eating and about ruining my whole day of eating well and my workout yesterday. I said (literally out loud in my car) "Hilary you are better than that, you are in control, and recognize that you are stressed". I kept on driving home. When I did get home I had a low fat string cheese, almonds, salami, and some dark chocolate (but all small portions and I logged all of it in my calorie counter). Although I did have a small 'binge', it was still healthier than what I wanted to do.

My boyfriend and I went out to dinner for the first time in about two weeks. We both chose to had salads (I had a salmon salad with the dressing on the side and no fried won tons, modifying food is a new hobby of mine haha), which we discussed we probably wouldn't have had before our health kick. We discussed goals, and how to meet them. I am beyond proud of us, and extremely grateful for his support. When I got home from dinner I decided to play Wii Just Dance and burned 300 calories while my roommate spun on her bike in the living room. It was really nice to work out together at home. I didn't have time to get to the gym because I had to do four loads of laundry so I'm glad I got some movement in.

This week has been about modifying my routine, my mind set, my reactions to situations, and becoming better about listening to my mind and body. Starting tomorrow I have four nights straight at the brewhouse so I need to stay on point and make good food choices while there.

Feeling Prepared

Weighed in this morning and was down 3.6 lbs. I attribute all of that to being consistent on logging calories and eating under my calorie goal daily. It was great to see that on the scale because of all the hard work I had put into planning meals paid off. This morning I also remeasured my body to help see additional changes as I go along.

I also cleaned out my closet and got my room in order for the coming week. I was pleasantly surprised to see that my summer shorts still fit. A little tighter than last summer, but they fit none the less. I am hoping they'll be big by the end of summer.

Today my friend Christina and I walked a mile to Subway to lunch and back to my place. It was a great day in Sacramento for a walk. I also got get started on the MyFitnessPal app! I'm so happy to have so many people using it. I bought a Shape magazine on the way home and it had a 5 week workout/weight loss plan, so I made a copy of it for her, and I promised to check in with her 5 weeks from tomorrow to see her progress. She is going to try to get her boyfriend on the wagon too, and I'll give the info to mine as well.

I am also going to go downstairs and pack my lunch for tomorrow so I can stay on track (I'm closing the brewhouse tonight and won't have time to make a lunch in the morning, so I'm planning ahead!). I've also packed a gym bag for tomorrow after school, so I can go straight to the gym from work. NO EXCUSES!

I am feeling prepared for the coming week (at least in the healthy lifestyle aspect, teaching...not so much). Bring it on!

Planning Ahead

Last night I made a SUPER yummy pizza for me and my boyfriend. Trader Joe's whole wheat pizza dough, red sauce, light mozzarella cheese, onion, mushroom, spinach and canadian bacon. I was really surprised with how well it turned out! It came out to 190 calories per slice, which isn't too bad. It also wasn't greasy at all like pizzas are from take out, it was clean yummy goodness. (Now looking at the photo, I feel that I could have used even less cheese. I still have left over toppings and all I need to do is buy more dough, looks like we might be having pizza again this coming week!)

After dinner we dyed some eggs. They came out great. I was very pleased with them. And since I did a dozen with my roommate the night before I left them at his house (by the way, they are yours to keep and eat. But only the whites! haha). We then started to talk about what we might do tomorrow, see a movie, go to dinner or make dinner... We decided to go see American Reunion, which I'm very excited about seeing. Also, my boyfriend has been craving frozen yogurt for the past week, and so we decided to make a trip to Pink Berry tonight. I put a mini coconut froyo in my phone for tomorrows "snack". And then the debate about what to do for dinner. I had already planned out my breakfast and lunch (and dessert), and was waiting to see what we decided to do for dinner. My boyfriend thought I was silly for planning ahead that far. But I don't have that many calories to "play" with so every meal counts. We landed on shrimp tacos for dinner,and with this I hit my calorie goal on the dot.

He had to work a half day this morning, so I decided to catch a BodyPump class at 10am. When I got there I set up my weights and waited for the instructor. Fifteen minutes later a 24hour employee comes in and says the instructor isn't showing up. One woman suggests we just do the class on our own, which I was all for. But some people packed up and left. I thought to myself, you set aside time for the gym and a workout, why would you leave? At one time in my life I would have been one of those people to leave, but instead today I did sit ups while waiting. A few minutes later the same employee came back in and said that a trainer and spin instructor volunteered to cover the class (although he had never seen or taught a BodyPump class). He came in and we kind of guided him on what we do, and he added some of his own weightlifting moves. Since it's not what I normally do when I lift weights (added reps, and different moves) I expect to be sore :) I did about ten minutes of the stairclimber and elliptical and headed home for a healthy lunch. I'm looking forward to our healthy dinner tonight, and to see what the scale holds for me on Monday! *Side note/thinking out loud: I need to remeasure my body to have other ways to gauge my progress.*

Amazing April?

Only six days into this month and I must say it is the best one I've had all year (and for sometime before that). The month started with a girls getaway for my mom's birthday in SF and I think that it kicked off the month in the right direction. It is also helps that the first week of this month I am on Spring Break from my long term subbing position giving me all the time in the world to do whatever I want (with the exception of the 20ish hours I've worked at the brewhouse). I am also in a really good "emotional place" right now. I've been waking up feeling energized and lighthearted and ready to take on the day. I attribute some of this to eating healthy, but also being re-engergized by seeing my family, my new relationship, and the support of my roommate in our healthy lifestyles.

I have been very diligent with the MyFitnessPal app on my phone counting calories (along with my sister Meredith, Dad, and boyfriend. It is really motivating to see them all logging days under their calorie goal). I have made two healthy dinners for my boyfriend and I this week, and am planning a wholewheat crust all veggie pizza for us tonight (if it turns out well I'll take a photo to show in my next blog).

I resisted a huge temptation to drive through somewhere last night after dropping my roommate off with friends around 10:30pm I was starting to get hungry and craving something sweet and I put the intended drive through food in my calorie counter and just couldn't justify it to myself. It was also a temptation not to go out with my roommate. If I had, I know I would have drank as many calories as I should have in half a day so I opted to stay home. When I got back I had a rice cake with a kiss of peanut butter and satisfied with my late night snack and it was only about 80 calories instead of the 300ish I was thinking about getting.

Yesterday I went to the gym and did an hour long BodyPump weight lifting class and ran for a bit. I started to get a blister while running, so I decided my shoes of a year and 4 months had served me well and it was time for something new. I ended up with some new Nike shoes (not exactly the colors I would pick, but they feel great!). Also with the suggestion from my friend Linda, some new synthetic material socks to help reduce friction. I am eager to try them out tomorrow! I woke up this morning a little sore from lifting, but it feels sooo good!

April, So Far, So Good

April is moving along quiet well for the time being. I ordered and received my FitBit on March 29th and am excited using it. It is very discrete compared to my BodyBugg. I can wear it on my bra and no one can tell. I love seeing how far I walk seating people at the brewouse and how many flights of stairs I climb while at home. It also somehow tracks how well I sleep (so far I'm at an average of 96%, which is great). It also can sync with my Iphone to the calorie counting program I've been using, MyFitnessPal. If anyone has an Iphone I highly recommend the MyFitnessPal app. It has a HUGE amount of brands and restaurants to help you add up calories. It also has a camera where you can scan the bar code off of food items and it will automatically pop up with the nutritional information.

My roommate and I went healthy grocery shopping on Sunday and are both committed to getting healthy. I even have the boyfriend on board too. I've been trying to make us healthy dinners too. It's really nice to have a support system with people you can check in on, and help to keep you motivated. 

I've decided to stop getting food from the brewhouse because even their healthy items are still more calories than I can afford. There are only about 4 things that I am going to allow myself to get: Chicken Noodle Soup, Mozzarella Tomato Salad (no dressing), Grilled Chicken Breasts (with nothing else, no sauce), Mini EnLightened Beef Tacos (no chips or refried black beans), or a salad (modified with no added calories and/or light dressing).

I am happy to say that for the past two days I have stayed under my calorie goal. I am really trying to get back to the basics with eating healthy since I don't have a lot of time to get to the gym right now. I am going to try to get to the gym but am finding it so hard after 5 hours straight of standing at work. My feet are so tired I can't even think about running. But I need to get some gel insoles or something so I can get to the gym!

I'm excited and looking forward to what April has in store for me.

Only Post For March

So I have a feeling this will be the first and only post for March.

Things have been crazy busy this month. It's been a full month of school with no breaks. I am very much looking forward to Spring break off starting the 30th. I will be working at the brewhouse over the break, but am excited for a break from teaching. I have been working about 4 days a week at the brewhouse which has been keeping me busy on nights and weekends. At work I have not been packing the best lunches (mostly just throwing things in my bag, a banana, a bag of bagel chips, a fruit leather, and whatever else I can grab and go with), and I have not been making good choices at the brewhouse for my 9pm dinners after work.

I want to make April a better month all around. I have started seeing someone and we've both decided to start a healthy life style starting April 2nd (I am getting back from a birthday weekend for my mom with my sisters in San Francisco on the 1st). He is heading to Vegas this coming week, so he wants to start after that. I have tried to make us a few healthy dinners, but I'm hoping to do better starting in April. I'll try my best this coming week to eat healthy, but am working Saturday, Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday nights this week before heading on my trip Friday, Saturday, Sunday. I will make an effort to pack a healthy lunch for school every night, and pick healthier entrees at work for dinner. I would love to try to go to the gym tomorrow before my shift at 4:00pm, and on Sunday (my only totally free day until Friday), and then Thursday after school. I have a lot to do around the house that has been piling up and errands to run before the last week of school before break and heading out for the weekend. But I will try my best to get there!

I decided to go ahead and buy a new fitness tool, a FitBit. My friend Jaime has one and loves it and has lost over 50 pounds with its help and her hard work and dedication! I found that I wasn't wearing my bodybugg as much for aesthetic reasons and didn't want to pay for the monthly subscription to the site. It is to arrive on Tuesday, and I'm hoping this new gadget will light the fire I had for fitness at the beginning of last year. I am also very inspired by my friend Tiffany and her check-ins on Facebook to a gym back home. I want to be able to check into 24 hour fitness and feel good about the work I'm putting in again.

I changed the background on my phone to this photo as a reminder to get my ass going! (Because it's almost summer, and it's almost time for my 10 year high school reunion and a family reunion by the lake! Yikes!)

Strep Throat Diet

So, I have been, what feels like, knocking on death's door. Or at least have been strep throat's newest play thing. This is the worst I have felt since Winter of 2010 when I had strep the last time. I wish that the doctors had taken out my tonsils when I was younger!

I haven't been able to eat much of anything. I have been pushing liquids and have been sleeping a ton. I'm trying to trick my body into feeling better by getting out of bed and sitting up downstairs today instead of staying in bed. I am feeling better over all and have energy to do somethings. Open windows to get the bad air out, spray a whole can of Lysol all over the apartment, change my sheets, and wash all my contaminated dishware. But my throat is still tore up and on fire, so eating is difficult. I have had about a half pack of instant oatmeal, half of a mashed up banana, and a cup of mashed potatoes over the past few days. I know my body needs nutrients to get better, but it's hard getting them past my throat.

Good news, I have lost 6 pounds... But I would rather be healthy and not have lost them. :(

Good Choice #3, #4, and...

This morning I got up and wasn't feeling 100%. I have been fighting off a cold for what seems like forever. I felt as though I was over about a week and a half ago, but have been waking up with a scratchy throat and stuffy nose. I am hoping that it's just allergies, but medication doesn't seem to be working.

I had planned to do a Body Pump class this morning at 9am, but just didn't feel well enough. So I got up and went to Trader Joe's to stock up on some healthy food for the kitchen. I was very pleased with my choices and didn't buy anything off my list (which is hard because Trader Joe's has such YUMMY things!). Good choice #3.

I got home and made a canadian bacon, spinach, mushroom, and (light) cheese omelet with a 9-grain toast for breakfast. Good choice #4.

Around 12pm I was feeling better and decided that I was going to go to the gym and run for the first time in a long while. It felt really good to run. I didn't push it, took it slow, but felt accomplished in what I had done. Plus my throat wasn't feeling the best, and came home to have some soup and hot tea.

I'm thinking I'm going to do some Wii Fit a little after lunch, and plan a yummy/healthy dinner! First day of President's Week off is going great!

Good Choice #1 and #2

Tonight was a hectic night at work to say the least. Damn you 3 day weekend, tax returns, and Disney on Ice for making tonight way more busy than a Sunday should be. I wanted so badly to just get nachos or pizza at work and pig out when I got home, but I made a good (better) choice for dinner (at 9:30pm unfortunately).

I got a Balsamic Glazed Chicken (but without the fried onions on top). I did still eat the cheddar mashed potatoes. Next time I will just get the chicken and greens. But I am proud that I made a good choice tonight.

I also signed up for a 5k for this coming weekend. It's going to be rough not running at all for like 4 months and hoping back into a 3 mile run. But hopefully it will be a wake up call to get me back in gear!

Working like a crazy person, but slacking on health

Weight update: got on the scale and had only gained a pound since last time I wrote, and that has got to be some sort of miracle because I feel like the way that I've been slacking on eating/exercise, it should have been at least 7 pounds! Not that I'm happy at all with the way things have been going but I am pleased that it I hadn't gained too much.

February has been difficult for to to focus on my health. I am loving subbing and lesson planning and grading and all that jazz. But doing that 40 hours a week (plus planning and grading hours), plus 20+ hours at the brewhouse has left me little time to plan and make healthy meals let alone get to the gym. I have not been eating well, and it is really bumming me out. I know what I have to do to make better choices, it has just been extremely hard for me. For awhile I was taking healthy lunches to work, and have been taking a bagel on the go for breakfast (not the best choice, but not the worst). For dinner I've either been grabbing fast food between jobs (horrible, I know) or waiting to eat at 9:00pm or 9:30pm after a shift at the restaurant (not making the best choices because I am so hungry from not eating since 12:00pm, and I don't like eating dinner that late anyways).

This week is Presidents week off at school and so I am making a HUGE effort to plan lessons ahead of time for the next month, and get caught up on grading so I can put school work on a back burner for now. I am going grocery shopping this morning to get the fridge stocked with healthy food for this week off. I am hoping that getting a week of good eating going will help propel me into eating healthy and making good choices while back at school.

I have also decided to take this week off of school to get.my.ass.back.to.the.gym! I have been talking to my parents, who have been rockstars at going to the gym 4 times this week after work. My mom has mentioned to me about that good sore feeling after working out, and I miss that so much. I have also thought that my lack of effort going to the gym (or even just running around the neighborhood) is due to not having a finite goal to work towards. Last year I signed up for races that I had to continue to run for. I have looked into races coming up in the next few months and am going to sign up for them ASAP so then I have a date goal that I need to be running towards. (Not to mention this summer I have my 10 year high school reunion and a family reunion to work towards, but those obviously aren't motivating me enough to do what I know I need to)

I also need to find more time to blog! That was a new years resolution that I am totally slacking on. Time to go assess what is in my fridge/freezer/pantry and make a shopping list full of good choices!

Hectic Life...As Usual.

A very quick update on my life the past week or so... (I only have 20 minutes before I need to leave for work for a double shift)

- I am again single. Boo :( I am going with I'm so awesome guys don't know how to handle it and feel inadequate. So if you know any extremely awesome guys, or are one yourself, let me know!

- My family came into town last weekend for a 60th birthday party. I didn't watch what I ate at all but had a wonderful time with family!

- On my way to work last Sunday my car started to over heat adding more unneeded stress and monetary strain to my life.

- I finally feel like I have my footing in my long term sub position, but am still running around in the morning getting things together for that day's class since a lot of times I have to drive straight from school ending at 3:12 to a 4:00 shift at the brewhouse. I feel like I need to stay one day after school when I don't work a second job and just copy all the shit I need for a month!

-Last week I ate fast food again. It is an excuse, but I feel like I can't get to the grocery store to buy food. The weekends are filled with shifts from 12-8 (or something like that) and the last thing I want to do after standing and running around a restaurant is to go grocery shopping. I usually come home, and go straight to bed. Last night I worked until 11:20, came home and slept in until 9:30 then had to get up and get ready for my shift at 12, not enough time to shower, get ready, and go grocery shopping. I'd love to take a week off from the brewhouse, but really need all the shifts I can get until march 10th when I get my first full month substituting check. I'm hoping then I can breathe a little easier, but until then, it is non stop working.

- I got on the scale this morning and am up 2 pounds. I am feeling indifferent about the gain. I know I have been making good choices with the food I bring home from work. But I need to make good decisions during the week, when I am so tired and fast food, or just not healthy food is so easy (aka a frozen pizza). It is all about planning and making time for my health, which I have not been doing.

And that is all for now, off to work.

Redemption Day

Although today I didn't go to the gym, I did stay under my calorie goal (by nine calories). Even though I didn't get the gym in (I'm beyond tired, but need to not make that an excuse anymore, because I'm ALWAYS tired) I am still very happy with my eating choices today since the past two days have been train wrecks.

My Pesto Pasta and Shrimp for Dinner (About 400 calories)

Epic Fail...

Ug...

Yesterday I had fast food, and soda, breaking my new years resolution :( And today at Trader Joe's I didn't use reusable bags. I just started watching the Biggest Loser and am feeling unhappy about my choices today and yesterday. I need to take this opportunity to change my actions and get inspired from the Biggest Loser and get back on track T-O-M-O-R-R-O-W.

That is all...

Week Two

Weighed in this morning and wasn't surprised that the 1.5 pounds I lost last week had found their way back. I really made poor eating decisions this week and didn't make it to the gym as much as I had hoped. The poor eating decisions were kind of unavoidable, but I could have worked harder. It was a wonderfully horrible week. I was completely spent from Wednesday until this morning (I'm not subbing or working at the brewhouse), but I am excited to be in a long term sub position while my friend is on maternity leave.


This week in a nutshell:

Monday- Had a really nice lunch date, and we both ordered salads at the restaurant.

Tuesday- Went to Body Pump and Turbo Kickboxing and enjoyed watching the biggest loser.

Wednesday- Went to observe my friend Dominique's class because I was going to take over when she went on maternity leave in the next few weeks. She ended up getting a call from her doctor during 2nd period saying she needed to go to the hospital right away. I ended up teaching the rest of her class. And then I worked a shift at the brewhouse. Needless to say I was exhausted and didn't make a good choice for my dinner at work.

Thursday- I subbed in Dominique's class again. I tried my best to bring a healthy lunch, but I didn't have any lunch food ready to go or planned for the week because I wasn't expecting on working. The new guy did make me a super nice dinner of steamed veggies, pork tenderloin, and salad. But I did have two beers that evening. But we had a wonderful evening.

Friday-  I subbed again and worked a closing shift at the brewhouse. I picked a calzone to have for dinner. Not the best choice, but I did pack it full of veggies. 

Saturday- I worked at the brewhouse and was exhausted and made a really bad choice for dinner. I basically ate a whole days worth of calories for dinner alone.

Sunday- Another shift at the brewhouse. But I did find a new dinner that I think I'll be getting. It's a balsamic glazed chicken with a salad and mashed potatoes and is about 600 calories. Not too bad.

This week's goals are to pack better lunches, and make it to the gym as many times as possible this week. I don't work at the brewhouse again until Saturday so I am hoping that I can go to the gym most weeknights. It will be sooo much easier to get to the gym when I don't have to go from school ending at 3:15 to a 4:00 shift at the brewhouse.  I also need to make better dinner choices this week to see if I can get that 1.5 pounds to leave again!

Workout High

Right now I am on a total workout high! I did Turbo Kickboxing and then a Body Pump class. I am feeling really full of energy and am in a really good mental place too.

I came home from the gym and ate what seemed like 5 cups of broccoli (but was really about 2) because it was gonna go bad in a bit.

I really love working out hard on Tuesday so then I can feel good about watching the Biggest Loser without feeling guilty that I didn't workout today.

I'm settling in for the night with the Biggest Loser and some herbal tea!

Week One

So I am counting this Monday as the end of week one of the new year. I'm weighing in Mondays again and did so this morning. I am down 1.5 pounds! Yes! First week, first success! I am excited to start the new year with a loss, and can't wait to keep it going.

This week in a nutshell:

Monday- Bad date night, but ate really well.

Tuesday- Went to Body Pump at 24 and loved lifting again. But at the end I was SO sore.

Wednesday- A family member got the stomach flu and needed me to stay the night and watch her kids. A friend had brought her Spaghetti Factory for dinner, so I had the Mazithra Cheese and Brown Butter pasta that was there. Not complaining, it was yummy, but not super healthy.

Thursday- Helped with my cousin in the morning, and was wiped out by playing with them the night before and in the morning, and not having slept in my own bed. I came home and slept the rest of the day.

Friday-  I went to a new class called PiYo Strength. It was was really interesting. It's a mix between Pilates and Yoga. I really enjoyed that it was a little faster paced than yoga, but worked on holding poses and strength moves to build muscle. It was a great way to work my muscles out after Body Pump earlier in the week even though I was still sore! :)

Saturday- I worked an 8 hour shift at the brewhouse and was awarded for my effort and teamwork with the manager buying me an appetizer. I picked something "bad", but it was a super long day, and I skipped lunch and couldn't resist. Willpower was at a low at 8:30pm after only having a bowl of cheerios and a a banana all day.

Sunday- Had another first date with a new guy. He was history major like I was and we both enjoy reading mystery books, so we decided to meet in the Barns and Noble bookstore in the mystery section (how cute, right?!). We ended up sitting in the coffee cafe area, but didn't get anything to drink. We talked about how we are both trying to eat healthier and exercise, so I feel a lot better that this guy could fit into my life better than last Monday's date. We spent the rest of the date looking at books. In hopes that our date went well, he even brought a book from his place that he thought I would like. The date did go well, so I took the book and now have some new reading material! And then headed off to work for a dinner shift.

I have spent the morning cleaning the house and doing catch up on laundry. And have a lunch date with the "mystery book guy". :)

Things I did well last week: I made it to the gym, although only twice. I also have been eating a healthy breakfast every morning. I also have used reusable bags all this week while shopping.

Things to work on for this week: I want to try to drink more water. I had a couple of good days, but slacked on water drinking other days. I would also like to work on making sure I am eating a good lunch and dinner and not skipping meals like I did a few times last week.

Relationship Realization

First of all, I am soooo excited that a new season of The Biggest Loser is starting tonight!!! And I feel worthy to watch because I spent 90 minutes at the gym this morning! I'm also going to try to do some sit-ups and stretches during the commercials to get in a little extra!

On the 30th and 31st I rearranged my room to make room for some new furniture. On the first I felt fine and ate well. I didn't hit the gym, but did some Just Dance 3 to sweat a bit. But on the second my back was tweaked. I couldn't move without feeling a little pinch, so I decided I didn't want to make things worse, so I didn't do any exercise and sat with a heating pad on my back most of the day.

Last night I had a first date. It was someone I met on an online dating site. We had been texting for a week before hand, and he seemed like a normal guy. The pictures from the site showed him as a 6'4" guy with a little extra weight on, which is fine because as we all know, I have a little extra weight on too. I had mentioned to him that I was trying to get back into running, and not drinking. I shared with him my new years resolutions about health and fitness and felt that I had held nothing back to who I am and what my life focus is now. I let him pick the restaurant for dinner. He picked California Pizza Kitchen. I was ok with that because I know they have some healthful options and small plates. I picked out that I was going to have an arugula and asparagus salad with a side of foccacia bread. It did put me over my calorie count by about 300, but I was ok with that.

We meet each other at the restaurant and my first impression is that his photos were about a year and +100 pounds out of date. We introduce ourselves and head to our table. The first thing he does is offer me the cocktail menu, when he knew I was trying not to drink. Strike One. I told him to feel free to have one, but I wouldn't be joining. We order, I stuck with my salad and bread, he ordered four cheese ravioli and a taco appetizer. The conversation was alright, not sparkling witty sweep me off my feet conversation though. The dessert menu arrives, and he tries to tempt me to get something. Why are you trying to sabotage me when we just met!? Strike Two. It didn't seem as though he wanted the date to end after dinner, so I suggested we walk to the BJs at the other end of the mall.

Not even a fourth of the way to the restaurant his breathing gets heavier. I was thinking, "well, ok, this is definitely not a person that would want to run a 5k with me, or it would be difficult to go to Disneyland with". I had decided that I was just going to get water and if he wanted something, like a cocktail, that would be fine. I just knew they were open later and it was a casual place to talk. When we went to sit down I saw my worst nightmare happening, but not to me. He didn't fit in the booth with a non-movable table. I didn't even think that we should grab a high top table, I was thinking comfort, and booths are comfortable. He kinda squeezes in, and immediately I suggest we get a tall table. At work I see people walk in who clearly will not fit in a booth, so I seat them at a table so they don't have to ask or be embarrassed having to squeeze in. Then he orders a Pazooki (a cookie with ice cream). Strike Three. On a first date I feel that you are to be on your best behavior and not make waves. If someone told me they were a recovering alcoholic, I would never order a cocktail in front of them. At that point I really tried to drive home my dedication to being healthy, hoping that he might respond positively and say that he is looking to do the same, but he just kept eating his cookie. And that was kind of the deal breaker for me.

We left the date open ended and didn't plan another one. I drove home feeling like a horrible person that I didn't want to date this guy because of his eating habits and weight. I was wondering how to tell him that I didn't want to see him again, should I just go with the standard "There just wasn't any sparks" (which there wasn't). I got up this morning even more dedicated to my health because I never want to not be able to sit in a booth! (Among other things). I went to a Body Pump class and felt SO good after. Even though at one point my legs and arms were shaking while squatting or doing tricep dips. I also went for a mile on the elliptical when I was done and came home and made a healthy egg scramble.

I was still feeling guilty about why I didn't want to see this guy again. I had to call my mom and dad (separate calls, haha). I explained to my dad my feelings and the situation and he made the point that is wasn't my date's weight that was the deal breaker, it was the fact that his lifestyle doesn't mesh with mine at this point in time. That I need someone that will be taking the same journey or is supportive of mine and won't sabotage it. My mom told me exactly the same thing. It made me feel better that they could help me sort down to the root of why I didn't want to see this person again. I have no problem with extra weight on my significant other, it is more the support I need and deserve from a partner.

I still haven't found a way to let him down gently that I don't want to see him again. I'm hoping that a lack of me texting him back will give him a hint... But at least I learned something about myself and what I'm looking for in a partner. That is my relationship realization.

Starting 2012 Off Right

First of all, Happy New Year to all. I spent last night working at the Brewhouse until 7:30pm. I got my last "bad" meal from work, my favorite Santa Fe Spring Rolls, deep fried with a yummy (and I'm sure fattening) dipping sauce. I came home, didn't drink, and just relaxed at home. I set my alarm for 11:55, in case I fell asleep (which I did), so I could take this picture to remind me that now is a new year.

For the past two weeks I have being trying to think about my new year resolutions and how I want to achieve them. My friend Dianna posted this link to a women's fitness group I started on facebook, and it really got me thinking.
http://www.11points.com/Personal/11_Findings_From_My_Resolution_To_Work_Out_Every_Single_Day_In_2011?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Feed%3A+11points+%2811Points.com+RSS+Feed%29
The point of the link is that this person made a resolution last year to work out at least 20 minutes a day EVERYDAY of the year. They thought about what working out meant to them, was it running for 20 min a day, going to the gym, etc. I have decided to do something like that myself. Also, while at home a family friend Julia read a status from one of her facebook friends "Somewhere, someone busier than you is out running". And it got me thinking, my life is really not busy at all, and even if it was, can I not manage 20 minutes of exercise a day? Yes, I can. Even if it is just running down my street in one direction for 10 minutes, and then turn around and run back. Not hard.

After much thought, my new year resolutions are as follows:
- Drink (at least) 64 oz of water a day
- Use reusable grocery bags at all costs
- Do at least 20 minutes of intense exercise a day, every day ("intense exercise" is a fluid concept, but does not count walking around the mall, walking the block, etc. It needs to make me sweat and breath hard)
- No soda (I don't drink that much anyways, so it shouldn't be hard to cut out)
- No fast food (I did way better with this in 2011 than any other year, but I really want to make an effort to just say no to fast food)
- Blog regularly, it really does help me stay on track 
- Get back to running some 5Ks to work up to a 10K or half marathon

I woke up this morning and hopped right on the scale to see what damage I had done over the holidays. To my surprise I had only gained 2 lbs. I put on my Brewhouse slacks last night and they felt tighter than usual, so I was afraid it would be more like +5 or 7 pounds. I got dressed had a bowl of weight control oatmeal. And then headed to Safeway to buy some groceries to restock my fridge and pantry. I was very careful to think out meals and think about what I really needed to eat to get back on track. I also found a magazine to help inspire me to get back on track, the People "Half their Size" issue. I also got home to find a Fitness Magazine that got delivered when I was at home. I made a few open faced turkey, laughing cow cheese, and lettuce sandwiches with a fruit leather and BBQ flavored wheat thins.

I am going to make a gym schedule (or at least write down class times so I know when some of my favorites will be offered) and take a look at my magazines. I also have a yummy fish dinner planned for tonight to keep the good eating going. I am looking forward to what 2012 has in store for me. 2011 beat me up a bit, but losing 40 pounds last year made me feel great and proved to myself that I can make it work, I just need to put in the work! :) So far 2012 is looking better, I am back on a healthy eating track, have my job at the Brewhouse and a long term subbing position on the horizon, and a promising first date scheduled for tomorrow night. I need to keep organized and focused on me and my goals and I'm looking forward to kicking healthy habits into high gear in January to keep them going strong all through 2012!